


Welcome to the House of Striders

by Shortstuck



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, M/M, Smooth Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-09
Updated: 2014-12-09
Packaged: 2018-02-28 18:50:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2743349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shortstuck/pseuds/Shortstuck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bro doesn't let Dave have people over.<br/>Then he lets Dave bring John over.</p><p>This is  why we can't let people come over, Bro.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Welcome to the House of Striders

"Okay, John. This is the first time you're staying at my place so let me give you the low-down of how to handle yourself in the Strider household." Dave said as he opened the door to his apartment building and headed for the elevator. John was right behind him, following closely as he made a small scoffing noise.

"You mean to tell me that you have rules? What are they? Don't look, touch or even think about your mixing equipment? Don't fuck any of your Bro's smuppets?" John teased as Dave pushed the button to call the elevator.

"Yes. All of those, actually. And more!" He folded his arms and turned to John. "Don't drink my apple juice, don't touch any of the swords and don't make direct eye contact with my Bro."

"All of those sound stupid. I should just go home." John huffed.

"Well you're welcome to do just that, but I don't think you'll want to take that walk. It's a two hour drive, man." Dave pointed out as the elevator came. "And I picked your sorry ass up and I'm not taking you back until Monday." Dave got onto the elevator, followed by John who had a full-on pout.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." He rolled his eyes as Dave pushed the button for the very top floor. The elevator was on the move. "So. Why did your Bro finally decide to let me come stay?" He asked to make conversation. That, and he was really curious.

"I think he said it had something to do with us turning 18. He runs a porn site out of our living room. I don't think he wanted anyone in the place under 18 with all that shit."

"Good point, I guess. But you grew up around it."

"And I'm used to it. He didn't want any new people coming in. Hell, he didn't even let his boyfriend or whatever come over for the longest time."

"Damn. Did you ever have anyone over?" 

"Nah. We like our privacy. At least I do. I think Bro wishes he could hang around people more. At least I got to go to school and see people and shit. He was always home. Always." 

"Oh great. Can't wait to spend the weekend with a fucking shut in and his weird socially awkward brother." 

"Which one is which?" Dave cocked his eyebrow and looked down at John, who began laughing.

"You will never know."

"Ey fuck you, Egbert." Dave called out as the elevator door opened and they walked out. John was still snickering at Dave, who flipped him the bird before opening the door to the apartment. The boys shuffled in with Dave looking around to see if his Bro was anywhere in the apartment. No sign of him. And that's anything but good.

John, on the other hand, was distracted by all the posters of puppets. And all the hung up puppets. And the...naked? Are those puppets naked? What the hell is with the dick noses? He was nowhere near prepared for the sheer amount of phallic dolls in this apartment. He was baffled as to how Dave lived here as long as he did without going crazy.

He scoffed a bit and turned to look for Dave. He was gone. How the hell does someone disappear in such a small damn apartment? He headed down the only hallway and opened the first door he saw. It was Dave's room. He had seen it a few times on video chat with him so he knew right away. He set his stuff down and sat on the bed, confused and a little scared. What the hell was going on?

Dave had meandered through the house while John was looking through all the puppets. He popped into his room and made sure Bro didn't set anything up to fuck with him and John. If his Bro pulled some shit John might turn this into a prank war and he was nowhere near up for such bullshit this weekend. Once he had the place cleared he headed back to his room to find John waiting for him

"Are you done you paranoid bastard?" John laughed at him.

"Go to hell, Egbert. My Bro is a master douche lord. He can and will fuck your shit up at any given time." Dave huffed and as if on queue, Dave's bedroom window opened and in flew a tall, muscular man wearing triangle shades and an orange hat. He was wielding a katana, and he swung it right at Dave, cutting his belt off, letting his pants fall around his ankles to expose his bright red boxer briefs. And it was just like that and he was gone. Dave screamed and cursed as he fumbled and pulled his pants up. He kept bitching about being unable to keep belts. This clearly wasn't a one-time thing. John couldn't keep his laughter in. He was on the ground on the verge of tears.

John took some time to recover with Dave still bitching about what just happened. Once he began to compose himself he burst out laughing again, much to Dave's dismay. Dave spent about an hour telling John to go to hell and fuck right the fuck off. It's didn't affect him in the least. He still made terrible comments on it all night. Dave swore this would be the first and last time he ever has anyone over.

"Hey, brats." Dave's bro showed up in his doorway later in the evening. They looked up from their respective computers at him.

"Don't even introduce yourself you sweaty, uneducated mammal." Dave grumbled at his brother. John giggled.

"Dirk." He said, nodding at John and then looking back at Dave. "Better? I ordered Chinese." He held up a to-go bag full of containers and chopsticks. "Knock yourselves out." He set it inside the door and left again.

"Damn. He really doesn't interact with any living being much, does he?" John said as he set his laptop down and went to go get the bag of food. Dave shuffled over to him and the bag as they opened it right there, pulling everything out and dividing it up.

"I told you. And I can't even say 'he's not always like this' because he sure as fuck is."

"That is awful sad." John said as he dug into his food.

"Tell me about it." Dave joined John in dining as they went back to their previous spots and got right back to their computers. For the most part, the night was spent in silence, with a bit of small talk banter passed between the two friends. They didn't ind hanging out like this. Some nights are filled with loud jokes and video game marathons, but some are just chill like this. But usually those loud nights were spent at John's house. First night at Dave's house, though fun and entertaining, also felt like it needed a bit of getting used to for John. So this was nice.

As the night continued Dave wound up sitting next to John on the bed, playing on his iPhone and dozing off. It was almost 3 in the morning. John was surprised they were up this late. 

Dave was the first out cold, curled up in a ball on his bed, facing the wall. John huffed, still awake as hell. He set his laptop down on the ground and stood up to stretch. He decided to head out to the kitchen and dip around for something to drink. He poked his head out of the bedroom. No sign of Dirk.

He headed towards the kitchen but stopped when he saw a keyboard on the other side of the room. He headed straight for it and smiled.

"Sweet." He mumbled to himself as he found a pair of headphones already plugged in. He slipped the on and turned the equipment on. He struck a key to test the volume. He nodded to himself as he started to play, always loving how the piano sounded. He hadn't even noticed Bro watching him from the kitchen. Nor did he hear him walk up behind him and pull the headphones off his head, making him jump and let out a startled yelp.

"Ain't anyone ever teach ya manners?" Bro asked with an almost exaggerated southern accent. "Ain't polite to go touchin' other peoples things without permission, ya know."

"Sorry, man." John shrugged casually. "Just like playing the piano. Can't help my fingers." He held his hands up and wiggled his fingers. Bro cocked an eyebrow from behind those stupid-ass shades.

"You any good?" He asked, unplugging the headphones.

"I don't mean to brag but fuck yeah."

"Well then. Let's hear somethin." He said as he turned on a set of tables next to the keyboard set. "Let's fuckin mix."

John smirked and stepped back to the keyboard, striking the keys in a fast-paced movement, setting up a fast rhythm. He was actually surprised Bro was nodding his head and keeping up a fairly decent beat with his knobs on the tables. He turned on a record on there and it was a low, bassy rhythm. Dirk told him to keep up with it. John did, playing along with it and keep up in perfect time. They mixed and played for about twenty minutes until Bro stopped and turned the tables and keyboard off. John let a disappointed sigh out as his hands dropped to the side.

"We done?" John huffed and looked to the taller man.

"You ain't half bad, kid. John, right?"

"That's my name!" John said happily, proud that he impressed Dave's older Bro this quickly.

"We should make music more often. I'd love to get samples from you." He said casually. John snickered a bit. "What?"

"Sounded dirty." He chuckled.

"You into that dirty shit, John?" He smirked. John's brow furrowed.

"You going to hit on me if I say I am?" He put his hands on his hips.

"I was going to do it regardless." Bro shrugged and folded his arms across his broad chest. John was a bit speechless at that. That certainly wasn't what he expected.

"Oh. Um. Well. That's cool, man." John tried to shrug it off.

"You're cute, ya know." Bro's smirk just turned into a normal smile.

"Wish I could say the same for you. Can't see a damn bit of your face." John grumbled. He heard Bro let out a low chuckle as he pulled his shades off, folding them and setting them behind him. John could barely make out what looked to be orange eyes? No. Hazel? No. Those were orange as hell. "Wow." He said quietly.

"Pretty cool, huh?" He said as he pulled his hat off to reveal his bright blonde hair. It was only about a shade darker than Daves and it sprung up into spikes. "Happy now?"

"Yeah.." John whispered as he looked Bro up and down. Okay so he was ripped, handsome and had killer eyes. He was good looking as fuck now that he had the chance to really see the whole picture. He sighed a bit and looked down at himself. Short, chubby, a bit awkward. Why the fuck is this asshole hitting on John?

"Good. Now that we got that out of the way. Gotta ask you again. You into some dirty shit?" He asked just as casual as before. John doesn't know what's making him react to Dirk like this. Usually he'd just bullshit and joke around and eventually insult the other person and leave. But he just does not want to do that this time.

"Depends on what you think 'dirty' is." John shrugged, still unsure of why he sounded so sure about that answer. Why the fuck is thi-

"Look around my house. Safe to say I'm into some dirty shit." Bro gestured to a few of those, what did Dave call them? Smuppets?

"Okay. Fair enough. I guess I'm pretty vanilla, honestly." John admitted.

"I can do with vanilla."

"Excuse me?" John said, a bit startled again. He was getting tired of being caught off guard.

"I'm just saying. Nothing wrong with that. You just need to broaden your horizons." Bro smirked and winked. That's it. John was officially ready to turn this shit around. He stepped towards Bro, grabbing his wrists and pushing them back onto the turntables, holding them there and looking up into his orange eyes. They were clearly full of shock. He was not expecting that. Good.

"Maybe you can do with some broadened horizons, huh?" John growled up at him, earning a small noise and a smirk from Bro.

"By all means, John. How would you plan on broadening them?"

"You seem like a domineering fuck." He said as he pushed his hips forward. "You need to be taken down a peg." He smirked as he heard Bro gasp and felt his body shudder.

"You gonna be the one to do it?" He said as he regained his composure a bit.

"Get on your knees and maybe I will." John let go of Bro's wrists and curled his top lip up a bit to give Bro a silent snarl. He backed off of Bro's body a bot to see what he'd do. He honestly wasn't expecting Bro to actually drop to his knees while running his hands down John's chest to his thighs.

"Woah, ah, fuck." He gasped in complete shock. Bro looked up at him and smirked as he kissed the front of John's pants.

"Who's gonna take who down a peg?" Bro licked the front of the jean material as he felt John getting hard on the other side.

"I'd say the one currently on his knees is. But that's just my opinion from all the way up here." John said casually.

"Well then." Dirk began undoing John's pants. "Maybe I should do something with the peg I'm going down on, huh?"

"It's about fucking time." John smirked and licked his lips and Dirk pushed his pants and boxers down, instantly palming John as he sprung free from his underpants. Dirk stroked him a few times before going to work, sucking on the tip for a moment before bobbing a bit, expertly working him over with his tongue and lips. John was gasping and moaning in absolute bliss. He felt a little ashamed to be reduced to a writhing mess like this so quickly, but this asshole knew what he was doing with his mouth. He slid his hands through his hair and started pushing his hips forward a bit more, trying to get deeper into Dirks throat.

"God you're like a fucking cock sucking master." John moaned as Dirk swallowed him all the was to the hilt, making John cover his mouth quickly to avoid making any noise too loud. He didn't even gag once. John felt like testing what he could get away with. He grabbed Bro's head with both hands and started snapping his hips forward, shoving himself down Dirk's throat as he fucked his mouth. Once again, the older Strider shows no sign of gagging. He relaxed himself and let John have his way, looking up at him with lust-filled eyes. John let out a low groan.

"I'm there." He whispered, giving Bro a bit of a warning. What he got in response was the thumbs-up. He had the okay to come down this guys throat he had only just met a few hours before. He had the okay to come right down his best friend's older brother's throat. He came so fast, so hard. He let out a loud cry as he let his load go in Bro's mouth. Each wave of pleasure that shot through his body sent more and more cum into Bro's throat. But he swallowed all of it with enthusiasm, moaning every time he was given more.

After his orgasm was ridden out to the point of over-stimulation he pushed Bros head back with a moan. He came off with a pop. John let his head fall back as he panted and gasped, trying to regain any composure he felt he could get back.

"Fucking hell, John." Bro smirked as he stood up from his place on the floor, looking John up and down. "You sure as hell showed me."

"Fuck you." John panted as he looked at Bro through lidded eyes.

"How's about I fuck you?" Bro suggested, grabbing John's hips and pulling him over to him. John smirked.

"I guess that's fair." John shrugged. Bro smiled and picked him up, carrying him over to the futon that was in the middle of the living room. He plopped John down onto it and sat next to him, smiling.

"You want me to bend you over? Or you wanna be on your back?" Bro asked as he reached under the futon and pulled out a bottle of lube. John only let out a scoffing noise as he kicked his pants off the rest of the way. He stood up and swiped the lube from Bro smirking down at him.

"Or you can just sit there while I ride you. Now undo your fucking pants." John demanded as he poured out some lube onto his fingers. He reached back and spread some on his ass, lubing it up before sliding a finger in to loosen himself up. Bro bit his lip and let out a moan as he obeyed, hastily undoing his pants and pushing them down far enough for him to fish his erection out. John tossed him the lube and he quickly caught the hint, pouring some out on his fingers to slick himself up. John watched him and moaned as he slid another finger in, stretching himself a bit more.

"C'mon, John." Bro held his free hand out and grabbed John's hip, pulling him to straddle his lap. John pulled his fingers out and scoffed as he wiped his fingers off on the futon. Bro wrinkled his nose but quickly dismissed it, not caring all that much. He held his cock up, lining it up with John's entrance and pushing in a bit. John gasped and closed his eyes as he began to slowly slide down onto Bro's shaft.

"Ah. Oh fuck yeah." John gasped and licked his lips as his eyes opened back up, looking directly into Bro's eyes as he slid down all the way onto the older mans cock. They paused for a moment as Bro leaned forward, kissing John passionately. As John kissed back his hips began moving. Slow at first, but quickly picking up speed in no time. Bro pulled away from the kiss to moan and gasp as John's tight ass. He had no problem feeding John compliments and dirty talk about his amazing plush rump and tight hole. John was loving the praises and rested his hands on Dirk's chest as his head fell back. 

"Come inside me." He managed to gasp. Bro reached back and grabbed John's ass, making him move faster and harder than before. 

"Fuck, John. You're so fucking hot." Bro leaned in and started to kiss and nip John's chest, trying to keep any marks he might make below the collar.

"And I'm-Ah! Here all weekend. You're gonna fuck my ass all fucking weekend." John demanded. All Bro did was let out a feral growl as his hips began bucking up into John as his ass came down hard. It wasn't long before John came again against Bro's shirt as he felt a button inside him being pushed over and over again. He tightened up and whined against Bro's neck. That was all The older man needed to release inside the dark-haired boy with a low moan.

It took them both a while to come down from their orgasms. John sat up and Bro slid out of him. He plopped next to Bro on the futon and looked over at him. They both made eye contact and chuckled.

"Well. That escalated quickly." Bro commented, earning a chuckle and agreement from John. Bro pulled his shirt off and wiped his dick off with it, tossing it aside. He looked John up and down. "You should probably shower before going back to Dave's room." 

"Yeah. I was planning on it." John nodded and ran a hand through his hair. "Fuck this was a good lay."

"I was thinking the same thing. Glad you're staying a full weekend." Bro looked over to John and winked. John chuckled and grabbed his pants as he stood up.

"Me, too. Looks like I need to visit move often." John smiled as he headed towards the bathroom, feeling awful proud of himself.

**Author's Note:**

> idk. i found this old fic on a flashdrive from the olden days.   
> sorry if its meh. but the world needs more brojohn.


End file.
